I've been wanting to do this for a while, but couldnt for a couple reasons. in fact i wasnt sure if i was ever going to do it. but here i am. sitting in this chair with an Appointment from the United States Air Force Academy. and while its still somewhat fresh in my mind, heres my story.
When i was in the fourth grade, i heard about this place called the air force academy, and just the name was enough to have me sold. i mean, in the fourth grade that sounds pretty cool! so i asked my mom and dad how you get to go there. and they told me you have to be very special-you have to be chosen. so once again my fourth grade mind process mistakenly concluded that you had to be noticed by this academy without any type of application process. i didnt even know what an application was at this point. so i figured, at the age of ten, that i was going to try my hardest to achieve this mountain of a goal. and this was the driving force that has brought me to be the young man before you today.
I began throwing myself in to just about any type of activity where you get "noticed." whether that be sports, church stuff, pretty much any type of extra curricular. but my parents also mentioned grades. so i was putting just as much if not more effort in to my school work. from 4th to 7th grade i kept this process going as best i could, and i have to admit that it showed. I still hadnt gotten to do anything SPECTACULAR yet though, and i had been looking for something like that for a while. by this time tho, i had figured out there was an application, so i didnt have to be noticed solely by the institution, but i was still on that path so i figured why not keep going. and in 8th grade i got the shot i was looking for. its a moment i credit as the start to my leadership career. i was chosen to be drum major of approximately a 60 member band. now if that doesnt get you noticed in middle school, i dont know what does. but i did it. and i excelled at it. and for the first time i realized i really liked being a leader.
so i continued this in high school. and by the time i got to high school, i had done my research and i knew exactly what the academy was looking for. i was ready to mold myself however necessary. they want you in varsity sports. so i made varsity soccer as a sophomore. they want you in leadership positions. so i got involved in AFJROTC and currently serve as second in command to our unit. They want youre SATs and GPA to be high, somewhere in the top 4% of your class. im #7 out of 354. and they want you in extra curriculars. so i started flight training, instructing at the middle school, staying active in church functions, and just generally getting involved in the community.
My junior year is when everything seemed to come together, though. i had the unique opportunity to attend the National Youth Leadership Forum in Washington, D.C. in the fall of 2006. Then i was selected to represent Vanden High School as the sole delegate to California Golden Boys State in the summer of 2007. Following this i was selected to represent my AFJROTC Unit CA-20011 at Aerospace & Technology Honors Camp at Kirtland AFB, New Mexico, living and working amongst the Top 1% of all AFJROTC Cadets in the nation. I seemed to have everything set to go. and i thought it was. there was no stopping me now. i'd been waiting so long for this and now it was within reach. but its funny how God takes advantage of the most important situations to show you something.
I started my application process as soon as i had time in the summer of 2007. i was filling out forms left and right and everything was running smoothly. It came time for the medical examination, and i wasnt that worried. i knew i had some hearing loss, but its very subtle and i hardly notice-i mean ive gone through all of school maintaining an above 4.0 GPA, so i didnt think it would matter. then i took the hearing test. and the results came back. and the letter arrived. "we regret to inform you that you are medically disqualified due to hearing loss exceeding medical standards." i was livid. i had worked almost my whole life to get this and now it was out of reach because of something i have absolutely no control of. my dad once said that the things in life that are the most frusturating are the ones that cause problems you cant fix. and this is a problem i cant fix. its a part of me. and i have to deal with that. but i realized thats what i had to do. i had to deal with it and overcome it. so i began the medical waiver process. and the people at the department of defense review board are in no hurry to get your paperwork done. and thats understandable. theyve got a lot of other crap to deal with. youre not high on their priority list. but this is hard to accept when your dreams have just been crushed. but i carried on with life. finally after what seemed like eternity i was up for re-evaluation. so i scheduled another appointment and had another hearing test. through the grace of God i passed this one falling right on the margin of standards. so i thought i had it this time. i mailed in the results and was ready for my profile page to read qualified. but it didnt. and didnt. and didnt. and no matter how many times i kept coming back to that page and seeing "disqualified" the pain in my heart and mind was exactly the same every. single. time.
but then finally i got a phone call from the review board. expecting great news, i answered and got a different story. "Yes Mr. Helton we'd like you to take an additional test at a military facility to rule out retrocochlear pathology with an emphasis on military adaptability." my angry side was ready to come back with "What the heck is retro cochlear pathology and what does that have to do with me serving my country?" but i restrained myself and pressed on. but i was frusturated beyond belief. do these people not know that its now march and other 18 year olds across america are finding out theyve got their appointments and you havent even looked at my application yet?? youve got to be joking... but i played along, the whole time asking God why? i was ok with learning something but i wanted to know what it was. but that would defeat the purpose now wouldnt it? so i took the test at a military facility (which was another fiasco id love to talk about, but ill save that for another day) and once again passed the test. the results were in and i didnt see how anything could go wrong now. and one month later i was correct... for a few moments. they had granted my medical waiver and could now look at my application. another couple weeks of waiting and my application saw the board. and the board decided i was qualified. yes! i thought, im in right? no. "Mr. Helton, you are a qualified candidate with no vacancy. the entire freshman class has been filled and unless a vacancy opens, you wont receive an appointment"
this is the part where i am livid again. you mean to tell me that while you were taking your precious time reviewing my medical waiver and requesting additional tests, you went and filled the ENTIRE freshman class? but what was i thinking. its the military. theyre liable to do just about anything. ok fine. i dont know why you brought me this far, God. and i dont kno whats suppose to happen next. but i give up. the situation is yours. you can have it. ive done all i can. now its in your hands. ill start planning for UC Davis, maybe ill be able to move out. who knows. but guess who called me on monday morning? it was my congressmans office. and you know what they said? "Zack, Ive got some great news. i just got off the phone with the Academy Admissions Office, and theyre going to offer you an Appointment!"
For the past 9 years, ive been waiting for this moment. and it was finally here. and i nearly dropped to my knees in the emotion of it all. i was in. i AM in. After all the crap i went through and after all the time i wanted to throw my fist through a wall in frusturation, i. was. in. and i realized the glory of it all. God wanted the situation. and He wanted me to surrender it wholeheartedly without any mental reservation. and i got what i wanted. and i cant thank Him enough now.
the reason i wrote this post, though, was to show those of you who casually walked by and said "Dont worry, you'll get in" why i hated those words. because that was an absolute that i couldnt freely believe. on the other hand i dont blame you at all for saying that. you just wanted to comfort me, and i appreciate your care. that was also quite a bit of motivation to keep going and get in. cuz i didnt want to have to tell all of you that it didnt happen. but it did. and i can rest. this is my story. and i thank every one of you that had a part in it.
When i was in the fourth grade, i heard about this place called the air force academy, and just the name was enough to have me sold. i mean, in the fourth grade that sounds pretty cool! so i asked my mom and dad how you get to go there. and they told me you have to be very special-you have to be chosen. so once again my fourth grade mind process mistakenly concluded that you had to be noticed by this academy without any type of application process. i didnt even know what an application was at this point. so i figured, at the age of ten, that i was going to try my hardest to achieve this mountain of a goal. and this was the driving force that has brought me to be the young man before you today.
I began throwing myself in to just about any type of activity where you get "noticed." whether that be sports, church stuff, pretty much any type of extra curricular. but my parents also mentioned grades. so i was putting just as much if not more effort in to my school work. from 4th to 7th grade i kept this process going as best i could, and i have to admit that it showed. I still hadnt gotten to do anything SPECTACULAR yet though, and i had been looking for something like that for a while. by this time tho, i had figured out there was an application, so i didnt have to be noticed solely by the institution, but i was still on that path so i figured why not keep going. and in 8th grade i got the shot i was looking for. its a moment i credit as the start to my leadership career. i was chosen to be drum major of approximately a 60 member band. now if that doesnt get you noticed in middle school, i dont know what does. but i did it. and i excelled at it. and for the first time i realized i really liked being a leader.
so i continued this in high school. and by the time i got to high school, i had done my research and i knew exactly what the academy was looking for. i was ready to mold myself however necessary. they want you in varsity sports. so i made varsity soccer as a sophomore. they want you in leadership positions. so i got involved in AFJROTC and currently serve as second in command to our unit. They want youre SATs and GPA to be high, somewhere in the top 4% of your class. im #7 out of 354. and they want you in extra curriculars. so i started flight training, instructing at the middle school, staying active in church functions, and just generally getting involved in the community.
My junior year is when everything seemed to come together, though. i had the unique opportunity to attend the National Youth Leadership Forum in Washington, D.C. in the fall of 2006. Then i was selected to represent Vanden High School as the sole delegate to California Golden Boys State in the summer of 2007. Following this i was selected to represent my AFJROTC Unit CA-20011 at Aerospace & Technology Honors Camp at Kirtland AFB, New Mexico, living and working amongst the Top 1% of all AFJROTC Cadets in the nation. I seemed to have everything set to go. and i thought it was. there was no stopping me now. i'd been waiting so long for this and now it was within reach. but its funny how God takes advantage of the most important situations to show you something.
I started my application process as soon as i had time in the summer of 2007. i was filling out forms left and right and everything was running smoothly. It came time for the medical examination, and i wasnt that worried. i knew i had some hearing loss, but its very subtle and i hardly notice-i mean ive gone through all of school maintaining an above 4.0 GPA, so i didnt think it would matter. then i took the hearing test. and the results came back. and the letter arrived. "we regret to inform you that you are medically disqualified due to hearing loss exceeding medical standards." i was livid. i had worked almost my whole life to get this and now it was out of reach because of something i have absolutely no control of. my dad once said that the things in life that are the most frusturating are the ones that cause problems you cant fix. and this is a problem i cant fix. its a part of me. and i have to deal with that. but i realized thats what i had to do. i had to deal with it and overcome it. so i began the medical waiver process. and the people at the department of defense review board are in no hurry to get your paperwork done. and thats understandable. theyve got a lot of other crap to deal with. youre not high on their priority list. but this is hard to accept when your dreams have just been crushed. but i carried on with life. finally after what seemed like eternity i was up for re-evaluation. so i scheduled another appointment and had another hearing test. through the grace of God i passed this one falling right on the margin of standards. so i thought i had it this time. i mailed in the results and was ready for my profile page to read qualified. but it didnt. and didnt. and didnt. and no matter how many times i kept coming back to that page and seeing "disqualified" the pain in my heart and mind was exactly the same every. single. time.
but then finally i got a phone call from the review board. expecting great news, i answered and got a different story. "Yes Mr. Helton we'd like you to take an additional test at a military facility to rule out retrocochlear pathology with an emphasis on military adaptability." my angry side was ready to come back with "What the heck is retro cochlear pathology and what does that have to do with me serving my country?" but i restrained myself and pressed on. but i was frusturated beyond belief. do these people not know that its now march and other 18 year olds across america are finding out theyve got their appointments and you havent even looked at my application yet?? youve got to be joking... but i played along, the whole time asking God why? i was ok with learning something but i wanted to know what it was. but that would defeat the purpose now wouldnt it? so i took the test at a military facility (which was another fiasco id love to talk about, but ill save that for another day) and once again passed the test. the results were in and i didnt see how anything could go wrong now. and one month later i was correct... for a few moments. they had granted my medical waiver and could now look at my application. another couple weeks of waiting and my application saw the board. and the board decided i was qualified. yes! i thought, im in right? no. "Mr. Helton, you are a qualified candidate with no vacancy. the entire freshman class has been filled and unless a vacancy opens, you wont receive an appointment"
this is the part where i am livid again. you mean to tell me that while you were taking your precious time reviewing my medical waiver and requesting additional tests, you went and filled the ENTIRE freshman class? but what was i thinking. its the military. theyre liable to do just about anything. ok fine. i dont know why you brought me this far, God. and i dont kno whats suppose to happen next. but i give up. the situation is yours. you can have it. ive done all i can. now its in your hands. ill start planning for UC Davis, maybe ill be able to move out. who knows. but guess who called me on monday morning? it was my congressmans office. and you know what they said? "Zack, Ive got some great news. i just got off the phone with the Academy Admissions Office, and theyre going to offer you an Appointment!"
For the past 9 years, ive been waiting for this moment. and it was finally here. and i nearly dropped to my knees in the emotion of it all. i was in. i AM in. After all the crap i went through and after all the time i wanted to throw my fist through a wall in frusturation, i. was. in. and i realized the glory of it all. God wanted the situation. and He wanted me to surrender it wholeheartedly without any mental reservation. and i got what i wanted. and i cant thank Him enough now.
the reason i wrote this post, though, was to show those of you who casually walked by and said "Dont worry, you'll get in" why i hated those words. because that was an absolute that i couldnt freely believe. on the other hand i dont blame you at all for saying that. you just wanted to comfort me, and i appreciate your care. that was also quite a bit of motivation to keep going and get in. cuz i didnt want to have to tell all of you that it didnt happen. but it did. and i can rest. this is my story. and i thank every one of you that had a part in it.
Labels: Appointment
